Difficult to please

A striving barber has just moved to a new neighborhood.

 

Roy went inside.

 

“First customer in two weeks!” the barber said to Roy.

 

“Really?” he replied unsure of the barber’s greeting.

 

Roy started to appreciate the work of the barber when a nanny with five tots - three boys and two girls – went in.

 

“Easily $20 each plus tip,” the barber prayed.

 

He was hoping to pay the rent.

 

“Good day, sir. I assume you experienced cutting hair of kiddies?” Jena courteously asked.

 

“Why of course ma’am,” the barber said. “I can do it even before you finish saying yabadabadoo!” he confidently replied.

 

“Very well sir,” Jena said with relief. “Just shorten the hair of these lasses too, will you?”

 

As Roy was about to leave, he fixed his hair in front of the mirror. The youngsters were looking at him interestingly. A few strands of hair seemed to ruin his otherwise handsome haircut.

 

Irritatingly, he looked at himself. Unsatisfied with his own hair looked at the children from the mirror and made the most painful expression he could make. Hastily dropping off a handful of coins as tip while he exited the parlor.

 

“Alright lads! Now who wants to go first?” the barber asked.

 

The children looked at the barber with tears welling up in their eyes.

 

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31 replies to “Difficult to please”

  1. ""rare*jonRez"" replied:

    :) :) :)

  2. ""rare*jonRez"" replied:

    be back to read this! :)

  3. Alexandra Garland replied:

    Very cute and funny!!
    -Alex

  4. zorlone replied:

    Recel,

    I’ll wait for you to drop again.

    Alex,

    I am really not a good short story teller. Trying to be one though. hehehe.

    There are different types and I still don’t know which category I should concentrate on.

    Thanks again!

    Z

  5. Jena Isle replied:

    Your contest piece is a superb one. You can write in any genre, because your knowledge is broad and you have had several experiences already, or you could write about medically related sci-fi, etc.

    This is short and good. Keep writing.

  6. Jena Isle replied:

    Btw Z,

    I’m flattered that you used me as one of your characters. Lol.

  7. zorlone replied:

    Jena,

    I apologize for making you a nanny. Let’s see if Roy likes his character. hehehe.

    Thanks for reading!

    Z

  8. Jan replied:

    I have a feeling Roy would go to Divisoria and lose himself among the sea of people there, eat some kwek-kwek at sidewalk foot stalls, and go home. He’d make sure he’s alone, stare himself down at the mirror, but he’d not make faces anymore.

    Instead, he’d turn on his desktop and write a melancholy poem about lost youth and all that dreary stuff.

    Or maybe write a blistering post about the barber.

    Or both.

    Peace! Roy. Teka, andito na ba si Roy? Makaalis na nga. “,)

    Incidentally, the word verification says, “Sorra”

    Sorra, Roy. lol

  9. zorlone replied:

    Jan,

    I am moved by the fluidity of the sentences you have just created. I struggle to learn that kind of a talent.

    Maybe we could make a story pieced together at twitter and call it “Roy’s misadventures.” Oops, I should be on Roy’s side and try to convince you to join us at the convention.

    They might have a lot of freebies…

    “Ohhhh… Freebies!” -Homer Simpson

    Z

  10. Jan replied:

    It’s all right to talk about friends who are not here. That’s the revised rules of engagement – relaxed and uninhibited. “,)

    Yeah, that sounds cool, your idea.

    I have a follower who tweets her micro fiction serially on twitter. But it looks strange because it’s as if she’s having a soliloquy at a market place. She goes on and on with her story while spammers push, the marketers sell, the divas thumb up their nose in the air.

    But an interactive tweet of let’s say misadventures of Roy would be lovely. And fun. lol. Especially if it’s Roy’s. “,)

  11. zorlone replied:

    I have to get my hands on that rule book! LOL

    Of course, Roy has to be present if we want to make a story about him.

    She must really love writing. Even if she has a lot of commercials/ads in between her scenes. hehehe.

    Okay, so, we need to discuss that with Roy too, right? Why not do it on May 9? Say at the UP Diliman Law Building?

    See you there!

    Z

  12. Roy replied:

    I dont know which one to comment first, the post itself or Jan’s and Z’s exchanges that made me coughing all throughout the afternoon.

    Let’s see, yes Jan, I do acknowledge that ‘unwritten’ rule — that someone who is ‘not around’ will be the topic of discussion.

    So you can just imagine which absentee friend will be the topic of Zorlone and Roy on May 9 during the blogging summit — the whole day.

    Wouldn’t it be interesting if there will be 3 of us instead who will talk about those who are not around?

    Now for the story, it could have been a perfect fit except for one miss – I don’t tip (lol)

    That’s why I never go to the same barber on consecutive trips, to sort of break the familiarity. Not that I’m really a cheapskate (ok, partly), but I feel like I could only insult him if I give a small amount, and I can’t definitely afford to give a bigger one.

    poor kids, they have to mret such a man before their haircut.

    Thanks for including me in your story.

  13. Scotty's Princess replied:

    Dokie,

    Puede na ung kahit Nanny lang ang character ko sa story mo, hehehehe!

    Another lovely piece!

    Keep honing your craft!

    Nytie nyt!

  14. Zorlone replied: (post author)

    I agree with your suggestion Roy. Three may be a crowd but it will settle things nicely. One would determine the decision of the group. Eg. Mcdo or JB? If the votes are 1:1, the last and deciding vote would matter a lot!!!

    Good suggestion about the barber… Yeah, I do that too! But, I end up telling the barber how my hair should have to look after he’s done. sometimes I look like an army guy with longer hair. LOL

    Btw, I am learning to write flash fiction… I find them interesting.

    Z

  15. Zorlone replied: (post author)

    Hello Lainy,

    Let’s see… will make a new one and I’ll tell you when you will appear. hehehe

  16. Scotty's Princess replied:

    Wohohoho!

    JS KIT working perfectly here now!!!!

    GALING!Recent blog post: Readers Poll Officially Closed!

  17. Scotty's Princess replied:

    FC!Recent blog post: Readers Poll Officially Closed!

  18. Jena Isle replied:

    Definitely JOllibee , if I’ll be the third vote or fourth?..lol…but unfortunately – that would not be the case. My being absent however, Doc Z, would not absolve you of buying my TLC,lol..TLC, TLC…ipadala mo na lang kay Roy…lol…

    Recent blog post: “MERLIN” Season 1 – an Entertaining Series at BBC

  19. Jena Isle replied:

    Definitely, it would not absolve you from buying my TLC..lol…and hop over to Ken’s blog, he has some flash fiction too.

    Recent blog post: “MERLIN” Season 1 – an Entertaining Series at BBC

  20. Jena Isle replied:

    What’s wrong with being a nanny? It’s an honorable occupation. I salute all those dedicated nannies all over the world. Only an insecure person would be ashamed of being labeled as a nanny. Have a stress-free day.

    Recent blog post: “MERLIN” Season 1 – an Entertaining Series at BBC

  21. Zorlone replied: (post author)

    You are right. I was actually thinking of maybe one of the lead characters and not just an extra in the story. hehehe. Not the actual occupation.
    I am beginning my day with a no stress motto! LOL

  22. Zorlone replied: (post author)

    Your presence will be missed! I am telling that even now. hehehe. There would have been nobody to tell us what not to do. You know, Roy and I might start running around and play with the other bloggers at the convention. LOL.

    About the TLC, wrapper na lang ang makakarating s’yo kapag si Roy ang naguwi. hehehe.

    I will be visiting Ken’s site again for more flash fiction.

    Z

  23. Eric S. replied:

    An interesting story, and fun too. I wonder if the barber learned a lesson from the actions. Who really was more in the wrong though? The barber for making such comments in front of a customer, or Roy for making it difficult for the barber to earn his money.

    Recent blog post: A Peaceful Respite

  24. Zorlone replied: (post author)

    Thanks Eric for those questions. I hope you recognized the names of the characters in the story. LOL.

    I am still learning about flash fiction maybe I would be able to make a part two or three if that was possible for this style in writing.

    I am really happy that you found time to visit my blog. Thanks a million Eric!

    Z

    Recent blog post: Difficult to please

  25. jan geronimo replied:

    Oh, I don’t mind if you talked about me as long as it never appears as a post then it’s fine by me. I admit though – talking about somebody else sounds delicious. :)

    This plugin looks great. Medyo maliit lng yung box. Looks as though mauuntog ako although I’m not that tall. hehehe.

    But this will do for the meantime. Wala pa kasi tayo sa WordPress eh.

    Recent blog post: CommentLuv Plugin For Blogspot Users

  26. jan geronimo replied:

    Yeah, what would I do without freebies. I’m restraining myself from joining contests. My readers might think I’m blogging for the freebies, and not because I really need to write. lol.

    I’ve got Simpson’s blood siguro. hehehe

    Recent blog post: CommentLuv Plugin For Blogspot Users

  27. Angel replied:

    This was a good first try at micro/flash fiction! I do have a few writing tips. Hope you don’t mind…just passing along what others have taught me.

    1. Always put commas before names, terms of endearment, etc. Like this: “Good day, sir.” or “Have a nice day, Charles.”

    2. Don’t use exclamation points too often. Some of the places you have them could be commas.

    Good luck with your writing!

    Recent blog post: Defeat

  28. Zorlone replied: (post author)

    You sealed it. I have nothing more to add. hehehe. Freebies and good company might make you want to attend the convention, right?

    Z

    Recent blog post: Blog to the world; Blog for you and me

  29. Zorlone replied: (post author)

    I have been itching to join wordpress, but I am not confident yet. He_k, I am going to register now!

    He he he!

    Recent blog post: Blog to the world; Blog for you and me

  30. Zorlone replied: (post author)

    Angel,

    Thank you for the comment. I really appreciate that. A doctor master this for of writing. We are boring when we talk, citing journals and books most of the time. So this one is new to me. I am learning slowly, but I make sure I gain something from people like you.

    Thanks!

    Z

    Recent blog post: Blog to the world; Blog for you and me

  31. jan geronimo replied:

    Moving to WP for another blog? Or for this one? I’d volunteer myself and Roy to do the heavy lifting. “,)

    Recent blog post: CommentLuv Plugin For Blogspot Users

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